Coffee Break
Awards that slam commercials are anti-American
Business First of Louisville - by Joe Mullich
Those irritating do-gooders are doing it again, sticking their upturned noses into a sacred part of Americana.
I'm not talking about motherhood or apple pie, but about something just as important -- TV commercials.
More people remember the words "Where's the beef?" than the beginning of the Gettysburg Address.
Recently, one of the networks ran an hour-long special about the funniest commercials on TV. Nirvana -- nothing but commercials!
It would have been perfect if the program had added a three-minute clip from "Friends" so I could have taken a bathroom break.
But now a group calling itself the Schmio Awards is lambasting commercials, particularly those aimed at kids.
The Schmio Awards are named after the Clio Awards, the real-life ad industry awards.
The Schmios are a travesty.
One Schmio Award was given to The Coca-Cola Co. and a Georgia high school for "turning schools into sales promotions."
First Coca-Cola got the school to hold something called "Coke in Education Day."
Nothing wrong with that: If not for unhealthy doses of caffeine, I'd never have been able to stay awake to get a diploma during high school and college.
But the Schmio people, who labeled this award "A Marketing Opportunity--a Terrible Thing to Waste," chided the school for suspending a student who wore a Pepsi Cola T-shirt on "Coke in Education Day."
I say, hooray to the principal for showing some backbone!
The incense-burning deadheads who gave out the Schmios might applaud a pimply-face kid for bucking authority, but I think the school and Coca-Cola are to be applauded for instilling the value of buckling under at an early age.
The other Schmio Awards were equally ridiculous.
The Schmios criticized Anheuser-Busch Inc. for using cartoon characters such as dogs, frogs, ants and lizards "to recruit future customers -- kids."
I guess these Schmio fools don't know kids aren't old enough to drink. Next, they'll be saying cigarette companies target kids, too.
Ha! Even if the charges were true -- and I said "even" -- I'd say the beer companies are to be applauded for using cartoons instead of Bob Uecker.
The silly Schmio Awards went on and on.
The Schmios chided Sears, Roebuck and Co. -- and who's more All-American than Sears? -- and Seventeen magazine for a print ad for a scholarship contest.
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